Autobot Museum
thumb|right|A sample of [[Arcee's various 'Prettiest Autobot of the Year' trophies.]]The Autobot Museum serves as a document of the Autobots' history on Earth. Started in Autobot City by rogue junk-collector Pipes, the Museum houses items of historical and cultural significance to the Autobots throughout. Unfortunately, because Pipes is a junk collector, it also has a lot of crap in it, like Sparkplug Witwicky's old toaster and a broken iPod that Pipes found one day, and then another broken iPod that he found somewhere else. In 2029, the Autobot Museum opened its Ultra Magnus Wing, after Pipes accidentally convinced himself that Ultra Magnus was dead. Nonetheless, the wing remains dedicated to the Autobot City Commander, and the statue of Ultra Magnus made from old water cooler tanks has become the Museum's trademark image. Items of Note * The Matrix of Fear - "This is the MATRIX OF FEAR. In the year 2029, a clone of Rodimus Prime attempted to subvert the Autobots with a right-wing political agenda that included strip mining Alaska for energon and creating a border fence between the United States and Mexico. When confronted by the original Rodimus, he used the Matrix of Fear in an attempt to destroy him -- but only succeeded in vaporizing a mass-produced wall print of Prowl. The Rodimus clone subsequently disintegrated when it came into contact with the original Rodimus." * Neural Calibration Helmets - "In the year 2028, Skids used these neural calibration helmets to save Grimlock from imminent neural collapse. The result was that Skids and Grimlock temporarily 'switched' personalities -- Grimlock becoming erudite and well-spoken, while Skids became aggressive and taciturn. FACT: Skids' theoretical psychohistorical analysis revealed that the use of this device resulted in a post-apocalytpic dystopia in the year 2107 in which he attempted to destroy all reality with a Chronal Boring Device. Fortunately, Grimlock and Skids reverted to their original personalities and Elita One used her Time Stop ability to seal the temporal rift." * A Pair of Skis - "In 2028 the Autobots faced the Decepticons in the planet Nepsa's 1.63 x 10^4th annual galactic ski-off competition. At stake was 10,000 energon cubes and the key to the planet, but the course was dangerous, full of competing skiers, cheaters and the fearsome yeti. The Autobot Quickswitch was able to narrowly grasp the victory. FACT: The planet Nepsa recently came under criticism for its totalitarian style protection policies, including their use of 100 foot robot sentinels, which the Galactic Council called 'unrealistic'. They were forced to recant their statement after Nepsa sent its robotic sentinels to sit on the Galactic Council Building for a whole week." * Photo of Gantry - "In a daring escape from the Decepticon prison planet Cygnus Beta, a group of Autobots crashed on the jungle world of Gragulox. The Autobots Paradigm, Mishap and Gantry made their way to a native village and summoned Autobot help, but the Decepticons were close behind. In the scuffle, a 'Walking Eye' that lay dormant on the planet was reactivated and attacked both sides, killing Gantry in the process." * Preserved Space-Dragon Offspring - "This specimen was taken right after a comet inhabited by creatures colloquially known as 'Space-Dragons' (spacia dracona) struck the Moon in 2028 C.E. When the Autobots and EDC went to investigate, they discovered this among many thousands of such creatures that lived within the Moon. All other specimens found were far too damaged to produce a good analysis. Only three were said to have escaped, after the Space-Dragon Queen met her untimely end." * Scourge's Deathscythe - "This is Scourge's weapon, The Deathscythe. For years he used it to terrorize Autobots, Sweeps and Dignity. In 2029, it was melted when a prophecy came true, and Pipes unleashed the full potential of his Robot Nerve Gas." * Virtual Construct Diskette - "This was the program that enabled the Autobots to access a virus that was taking control of EDC armaments, allowing them to enter a virtual world in which they fought said virus. When loaded, the construct will show an empty room until it a new environment is created by a programmer. Inside this virtual world, the Autobots were turned into humans due to the parameters of the program. (2026 C.E.)" * Truncheon - "In 2028, Impactor, Nightbeat, Quickswitch, and the rest of the guard contigent on planet P-19170167 returned home, after three and a half million years of isolation at the classified Decepticon POW prison complex, standing between the Decepticon prisoners, and the free world. On behalf of the warden (RIP) and guards of P-19170167: We are at last, free." * EDC Order of the Frying Pan - "The inscription below is signed by 28 names, each belonging to a crewmember of the EDC supertanker Hephaesteus. They were all liberated due to the heroic actions of the Autobots in a daring raid staged by the Autobot Intelligence division." * Velvet Cape - "From the Odio Plague of 2024, this cape was worn by Dispatch, the ancient Transformer who wrought havoc on the planet of Cybertron. Kept as a memento, albeit not a proud one, by one of his infected." * Blueberry Muffin - "From the appearance of The Muffin Man in 2028; a member of an alien race who demanded muffins as tribute in return for not deleting earth with his Giant Space Laser. Will he ever return? Who knows..." * JunkCon 2029 T-Shirt - Fitted over a torso mannequin stand there is a bright yellow and orange tye-dyed t-shirt with a few wrinkles and unknown chemical stains visible only under black light. Printed in bold blue font on the front of the t-shirt are the words: "JunkCon 2099." On the back is more writing: "Party King Pipes broke my fuel pump and all I got was this lousy t-shirt." Below this garment is fixed a small plaque upon the base of the stand which is engraved: "Lest We Forget... Limit Junkion visitor numbers." * Datatube - "This is THE RECORD OF TELLAX IX. In the year 2029, the Autobots answered a distress call on the bombed-out and lifeless world of Tellax IX. After being captured by a malevolent computer known as AM, they eventually helped reconnect its conscience. AM gave them this datatube as a remembrance of the people he had killed." Notes * The Autobot Museum is curated by Pipes. Wheelie serves as its janitor in exchange for being allowed to bunk there.